Soundtrack Meme

I usually detest most memes, but there was something charming about this one that piqued my interest. If it's good enough for a little stuffed bull, then it must be good enough for me.

I admit this is a purely mischievous impulse on my part; I bow to no man in my iTunes' ability to offer some really fucked-up, and yet, oddly thrilling juxtapositions when set loose at random.

(Also: it's rather depressing to realize you ate up the entirety of the 30 gigs on your mp3 player and could still fill it up twice over. I'm having to delete something every time I want to put something new on there; last night, Dylan's John Wesley Harding got the axe, I just can't love that album and am not sorry to see it go.)

Anyway:

Opening Credits

"So Many Ways" - Mates of State
Hmmm. This is actually somewhat appropriate. Sometimes I forget I put this album on here.

Waking Up

"If Music Could Talk" - The Clash
Nothing says "rise up to meet the day" like a dubby jam from deep in the heart of Sandanista!

First Day At School

"Almost Forgot Myself" - The Doves
Wow, the shuffle is being a bit indie today. Again, oddly appropriate, in a melancholy, John Hughes-meets-Cameron Crowe fashion. (I hate both John Hughes and Cameron Crowe, honestly. I'd have much preferred, say, some Gang of Four.)

Falling In Love

"We're No Here" - Mogwai
Now that's perfect. What is love if not blinding, pounding post-rock terror produced by Scottish people?

Fight Song

"A Winter's Sky" - The Pipettes
Yes. Perfect. This is the sound of me hurting you.

Breaking Up

"Ferdinand the Imposter (Demo)" - The Band
OK, this is not really a good pick . . . and yet, I guess it's got a plaintive thing going at the choruses. Not anyone's favorite Band song.

Prom

"Surge" - Funky Porcini
Maybe if everyone was taking a lot of speed and listening to a scratched-up copy of Birth of the Cool on the turntable.

Life

"Art Bitch" - Cansei de Ser Sexy
Yeah, this is my life in a nutshell.

Mental Breakdown

"Haze" - Dan Mass
Yep. When I go nuts, I hear slightly goofy lounge-influenced house tracks. Again, I didn't even realize I had this on here.

Driving

"Inocular A" - Mouse on Mars
Driving in downtown Boston, yes.

Flashback

"Black Flowers" - Yo La Tengo
Actually 100% appropriate, what a disappointment. I would have paid hard cash for the Chemical Brothers' "Flashback".

Getting Back Together

"Heaven Is A Truck (Live In Australia)" - Pavement
If love is a drunken car crash only briefly by flashes of wistful reminiscence, this is the soundtrack. It is, so this works.

Wedding

"Wilderness (Live)" - Joy Division
Having been married once, this is pretty close to what I expect to hear if I ever have to go through it again.

Birth of Child

"Seen Your Video" - The Replacements
There are few moments in life that cannot be made better by the Replacements. Sure, if I had to pick, obviously "Bastards of Young" would be more appropriate (you're never too early to indoctrinate your offspring into the cult of crushing disappointment!), but this mostly instrumental track carries a nice romantic heft as well.

Final Battle

"Hoist That Rag" - Tom Waits
Ah, a rookie - I just put this CD in yesterday (bye bye John Wesley Harding). Again, appropriate, especially if you are me. But not quite as appropriate as it would be for my American Idol audition.

Death Scene

"Rebel Rebel (Live)" - David Bowie
This is the really coked-up, super-glammy version off the David Live set - a criminally underrated live album, featuring some of Bowie's most distinctive (read: did he even know where he was when he sang these songs?) vocals. Perfect for that long march into the white light, since there was sure a lot of white powder involved in the recording of this song.

Funeral Song

"Saturday Morning" - Meat Puppets
Yeah, not quite as upbeat as I'd usually want for my funeral procession. But certainly violent enough. I want the weeping and the wailing and the gnashing of breasts, dammit!

End Credits

"Sweetness Follows" - REM
OK, I cheated here because it was really a David Bowie song (the album version of "Candidate", in case you were wondering), and I'm of the old school - no two songs by the same artist on a mix, unless you've got a damn good reason for it. Anyway, I couldn't have picked a better track than this - the most depressing song in the entire catalog of a intermittently very depressing band. Anyone who sees a movie of my life should want to walk into the parking lot and wrap their lips around the exhaust pipe of their automobile, for despair from realizing they will never be as cool as me.